Top ten reasons I choose to stay at home.

My #2 reason(s).

I'm a stay-at-home mom. It's 100% true. I don't really like that term, though. What I am, in reality, is CEO of this family. I am running the show, people. Not Dill -- bless his heart, he does work hard, but he's not here all day to manage this operation. And it's a full-time job. I need a business card like Mark Zuckerberg's. That way, when people are all like, "What do you do?" I can say, "Here, let me give you my card." Can you imagine the look on people's faces when they read it? "That's ... nice ..." or maybe just dumbfounded blankness.

(If you don't know about Mark Zuckerberg's business cards, you should really click on the link.)

But I digress. I stay at home, make my home, run this company or whatever you want to call it because I have made a conscious decision to do so. No one has forced me to be a homemaker. It's a profession -- no, career -- I choose to call my own. I say 'choose' because I think it's a choice you don't make once. You have to make it every day when you wake up and every second after that. I could easily shut my eyes, say, "Nope, I'm not doing this today," neglect my kids, neglect my house, neglect my responsibilities. But I make the conscious effort to get up, change the baby, and get the ball rolling every day.

It's just how we do, folks. I put my all into everything. I'm committed.

In an effort to humorize (Blogger is telling me this isn't a word. I don't care) my career as a homemaker, here is my Letterman-style list of Top 10 Reasons I Choose to Stay at Home.

10. Flexible scheduling.

9. Candyland, trips to the park, coloring and "tickle time" are all part of the job description.

8. Unlimited pantry and fridge access.

7. No dress code. At all. Even nudity is acceptable (at times).

6. I can look at Facebook, check my e-mail and tweet without fear of being fired.

5. Commuting sucks. Been there, done that.

4. Staff meetings usually occur around the table, with food.

3. My employees are cute, funny, and highly entertaining.

2. No shortage of beds, couches and pillows.

And the number 1 reason I choose to stay at home can best be summed up by this quote, from Barbara Bush:  

"At the end of your life, you will never regret not having passed one more test, winning one more verdict, or not closing one more deal. You will regret time not spent with a husband, a child, a friend, or a parent .... Whatever the era, whatever the times, one thing will never change: fathers and mothers, if you have children, they must come first. You must read to your children, and you must hug your children, and you must love your children. Your success as a family, our success as a society, depends not on what happens in the White House, but on what happens inside your house."